My entire life I have been proud to be an American. I have always loved my country. The beauty and majesty of our land, the pride that comes with being a citizen, and our freedom. Here in America we have so much that other places do not have and all of that came with a heavy price. Many have died or bravely stood to face many dangers to ensure that we would continue to have this wonderful freedom in our homeland.
However, while seeing an article the other day, I have realized that sadly, we are no longer able to call ourselves USA. That name stands for UNITED States of America. It breaks my heart but this country is no longer united. It has been said by many that we would be destroyed from the inside and this for sure has happened.
The article that I was looking at (and to be honest I couldn't even read it all, it just makes me so sad!) was that my home state, Ohio, is attempting to ban all travel to North Carolina because they have bravely decided that they do not want to allow men into women's bathrooms. Ban travel to an entire state just because you don't agree with it? The people who applaud this, by the way, are the very same people who threw a fit when a Christian baker refused to bake a cake for a gay couple and forced them to either do so in the name of acceptance or lose their business. Am I the only one who sees this as extremely hypocritical?!?
Those who know me know which side I stand on with these issues, but that is not the point. The sad truth is that people who hate our country and everything that we stand for are using these little issues to divide us and they are winning that fight! While we Americans fight with each other about skin color and sexual orientation, those who hate us are sitting back laughing at us and patting themselves on the back for successfully stirring the pot.
My fellow Americans, I beg you to forget the issues and realize that they are just pawns in our enemies game! United we stand but what happens when we're divided? We fall. We are falling. I don't want to watch our country fall. It makes me scared for our kids to think of what will happen when we fall. I'm not sure I would be able to continue my fear if it were not for my faith in God. People please realize that these issues will not matter once we have fallen and our freedoms are gone. We are being led like sheep to the slaughter but we still have time to get back up, turn and run away. But it will never happen while we are focused on individual issues.
Now please don't get me wrong. I do believe in equality, but guess what, once we agree to stop fighting these things will work themselves out. We can learn to accept each other and love our freedom again, but that will never happen while we are divided. I pray that someday soon we as Americans can take a stand and become UNITED once more.
If you need a reminder, please go watch the movie The Patriot or something else from that time period. Do you really think that these people went through such hard times and gave up so many lives so that we could fight about where we go to the bathroom or who bakes a cake? Please America, I beg you, please WAKE UP! Before it is too late, for the same of our children, let us become the UNITED states of America again.
Tuesday, May 10, 2016
Saturday, May 7, 2016
Perception
Perception is everything. The way you see things will control how you view life. I have learned this very important lesson in an awesome way recently.
I was a stay at home homeschool mom for 18 years. I absolutely loved being home with my kids and enjoyed spending each day watching them grow and developing a close relationship with them. However, as much as I love my children, I got burnt out along the way and started secretly wishing that I could have some time away. Now don't get me wrong, NEVER would I want to be completely away from my kids, but I started thinking that maybe I needed to go get a job and be away from them for a bit.
Now before I go any further, let me explain what I mean. I am not saying that it is bad for a mom to go out and get a job, nor am I saying that it is bad for a mom to have some time away from her kids. I still believe that is very important and healthy for some separation to happen at times. I am talking about what I have figured out is best for my family and on a regular, daily basis as any average day.
When we decided that it was time for most of our children to go to public school, I thought I would go back into the world and get a full time job and be a professional. Well, no jobs were available at the time. However, a position opened up a the preschool of the church we attended at the time. I could bring my children with me that were still homeschooling and it was only three days a week so I was still very much available at home. This was the perfect opportunity for me to get out of the house for a bit and earn some money, but still be there for my kids whenever they needed me.
I worked at the preschool for almost three years. Three-fourths through the third year my husband told me that I needed to get a full time job due to our finances. I was sad to leave the kids but excited to get back out in the world and be a professional. Yet, still nothing was available. I was hired, however at a local restaurant. Something felt off about this place, but I left the preschool (after many tears telling those sweet little faces goodbye!) and went off on my new career (I was promised the ability to move up to supervisor very quickly so this was to be a long-term, good thing, obviously it didn't turn out the way they had promised).
My perception at this point was that even though I adored my kids, I needed to be out in the world and get to know other adults. Live the lifestyle of spending the majority of my day away from my kids, letting them fend for themselves (which I repeat, don't get me wrong, I am not saying that there isn't a need for separation and learning to be independent, rather speaking of typical, everyday life) while I am out doing my thing. I had grown tired of sitting outside of the school daily, waiting for them to come out, then spending at least two hours a day driving the kids where they needed to be. I had grown tired of constantly having to pick things up in our home or tell them to pick up after themselves (ok that hasn't changed but the way I perceive it has). I was exhausted with my life and ready to begin a new life.
This new job was going to be my answer to this desire. I was going to be gone every day through the week and they were going to get themselves home (or my mom would be doing the transportation when they couldn't). My husband was just going to have to take the time off work for all of the doctor appointments, orthodontist appointments, and whatever else they needed. I would, of course, enjoy my kids in the evenings when I was home but the rest of the day was mine to go out and live my own life at my job.
Obviously, that is not how things turned out for me, or else there would not be this blog post. It did not take me very long to realize why God had not opened up any doors for me to get a professional, full time job. While I was exhausted with my life at home, I just needed a reminder of how much I loved it. I was miserable. First there was the fact that the job was awful. I have always been the kind of person to love working and always found good things in every job. This job, however was full of drama and lies. I will leave it at that for that subject. But I very quickly realized that my heart was always at home with my family. I actually missed picking up messes and sitting at the school waiting to pick them up. Even now that were in the teenage years where the "Hi! How was your day?" is always met with a grumpy sigh. I desperately missed it. I began wishing I was able to be at home to even do the mundane daily chores.
Finally, after many prayers and many tears, my husband saw my pain. He knew that I was miserable and that I needed to be at home. He told me to quit my job and immediately upon hearing those words I felt such freedom. I could be home with my kids and take care of my family!
Now those who know me understand that this was never about me quitting a job or me not wanting to work. I have always been a very hard worker and will do everything I need to in order to take care of my family. I just realized that no amount of money was worth me being going. I only have a few years left with my kids, one has already graduated and moved out. I need to be here taking care of them. I need to be the one that they can call when they're sick and need to come home. I need to be the one that is waiting for them to come out of the school at the end of the day. I need to be the one holding the house together.
Now that it had been taken away from me for a while and I have it back I am filled with such joy while doing the things that I had complained about only a few months ago. I sit in the parking lot and anxiously wait for my kids to come out. I do the dishes and praise God that I have a house full of kids to use those dishes (and an amazing husband who cooks breakfast in bed for me and goes to work daily so I can stay home and take care of our family!). A few months ago my perception of my daily duties was clouded by my being overwhelmed and exhausted. Now my perception is nothing but love and adoration for the precious gifts God has given me. I love my family so much and when I think about these things it almost feels like my heart is going to beat right out of my chest. I used to be upset and feel worthless saying that my life meant nothing and that I helped no one. I now see that my life is for my family and I realize how very blessed I am. I will go back to work one day and I will be happy about it. My kids will grow up and live their own lives (they have already begun their independence). But for now, while they are growing up, they know that mom is home and there for them no matter what. I no longer complain about doing these things for my family because my perception has changed. I no longer see myself and my exhaustion but my love for my family.
Everything is how you see it. Make sure that you are not allowing your perception overcome the true importance of your life.
I was a stay at home homeschool mom for 18 years. I absolutely loved being home with my kids and enjoyed spending each day watching them grow and developing a close relationship with them. However, as much as I love my children, I got burnt out along the way and started secretly wishing that I could have some time away. Now don't get me wrong, NEVER would I want to be completely away from my kids, but I started thinking that maybe I needed to go get a job and be away from them for a bit.
Now before I go any further, let me explain what I mean. I am not saying that it is bad for a mom to go out and get a job, nor am I saying that it is bad for a mom to have some time away from her kids. I still believe that is very important and healthy for some separation to happen at times. I am talking about what I have figured out is best for my family and on a regular, daily basis as any average day.
When we decided that it was time for most of our children to go to public school, I thought I would go back into the world and get a full time job and be a professional. Well, no jobs were available at the time. However, a position opened up a the preschool of the church we attended at the time. I could bring my children with me that were still homeschooling and it was only three days a week so I was still very much available at home. This was the perfect opportunity for me to get out of the house for a bit and earn some money, but still be there for my kids whenever they needed me.
I worked at the preschool for almost three years. Three-fourths through the third year my husband told me that I needed to get a full time job due to our finances. I was sad to leave the kids but excited to get back out in the world and be a professional. Yet, still nothing was available. I was hired, however at a local restaurant. Something felt off about this place, but I left the preschool (after many tears telling those sweet little faces goodbye!) and went off on my new career (I was promised the ability to move up to supervisor very quickly so this was to be a long-term, good thing, obviously it didn't turn out the way they had promised).
My perception at this point was that even though I adored my kids, I needed to be out in the world and get to know other adults. Live the lifestyle of spending the majority of my day away from my kids, letting them fend for themselves (which I repeat, don't get me wrong, I am not saying that there isn't a need for separation and learning to be independent, rather speaking of typical, everyday life) while I am out doing my thing. I had grown tired of sitting outside of the school daily, waiting for them to come out, then spending at least two hours a day driving the kids where they needed to be. I had grown tired of constantly having to pick things up in our home or tell them to pick up after themselves (ok that hasn't changed but the way I perceive it has). I was exhausted with my life and ready to begin a new life.
This new job was going to be my answer to this desire. I was going to be gone every day through the week and they were going to get themselves home (or my mom would be doing the transportation when they couldn't). My husband was just going to have to take the time off work for all of the doctor appointments, orthodontist appointments, and whatever else they needed. I would, of course, enjoy my kids in the evenings when I was home but the rest of the day was mine to go out and live my own life at my job.
Obviously, that is not how things turned out for me, or else there would not be this blog post. It did not take me very long to realize why God had not opened up any doors for me to get a professional, full time job. While I was exhausted with my life at home, I just needed a reminder of how much I loved it. I was miserable. First there was the fact that the job was awful. I have always been the kind of person to love working and always found good things in every job. This job, however was full of drama and lies. I will leave it at that for that subject. But I very quickly realized that my heart was always at home with my family. I actually missed picking up messes and sitting at the school waiting to pick them up. Even now that were in the teenage years where the "Hi! How was your day?" is always met with a grumpy sigh. I desperately missed it. I began wishing I was able to be at home to even do the mundane daily chores.
Finally, after many prayers and many tears, my husband saw my pain. He knew that I was miserable and that I needed to be at home. He told me to quit my job and immediately upon hearing those words I felt such freedom. I could be home with my kids and take care of my family!
Now those who know me understand that this was never about me quitting a job or me not wanting to work. I have always been a very hard worker and will do everything I need to in order to take care of my family. I just realized that no amount of money was worth me being going. I only have a few years left with my kids, one has already graduated and moved out. I need to be here taking care of them. I need to be the one that they can call when they're sick and need to come home. I need to be the one that is waiting for them to come out of the school at the end of the day. I need to be the one holding the house together.
Now that it had been taken away from me for a while and I have it back I am filled with such joy while doing the things that I had complained about only a few months ago. I sit in the parking lot and anxiously wait for my kids to come out. I do the dishes and praise God that I have a house full of kids to use those dishes (and an amazing husband who cooks breakfast in bed for me and goes to work daily so I can stay home and take care of our family!). A few months ago my perception of my daily duties was clouded by my being overwhelmed and exhausted. Now my perception is nothing but love and adoration for the precious gifts God has given me. I love my family so much and when I think about these things it almost feels like my heart is going to beat right out of my chest. I used to be upset and feel worthless saying that my life meant nothing and that I helped no one. I now see that my life is for my family and I realize how very blessed I am. I will go back to work one day and I will be happy about it. My kids will grow up and live their own lives (they have already begun their independence). But for now, while they are growing up, they know that mom is home and there for them no matter what. I no longer complain about doing these things for my family because my perception has changed. I no longer see myself and my exhaustion but my love for my family.
Everything is how you see it. Make sure that you are not allowing your perception overcome the true importance of your life.
Monday, May 2, 2016
To Him who could do more than I could even hope for
As I type this I sit in my home that I share with my husband and our six children. We have lived here for almost eleven years and have many memories of raising our precious little ones (who aren't quite so little anymore as much as I hate to admit it). We have had a lot of hardships and been through the ringer many times, but we made it through and I am very proud of my family.
Today marks one year since I graduated college. Me! Steph Loughman. The girl who barely graduated high school. Not only did I graduate college, but I did so with a 4.0 grade point average and was on the Dean's List every quarter. So many amazing things have happened since then, including God giving me a message and allowing me to write a book which will hopefully lead to a ministry for my husband and I.
It may seem that I am bragging on myself. Anyone who knows me knows that while I brag on my family often, bragging on myself rarely happens. Don't get me wrong, I am bragging, but not on myself. For the things that I have accomplished or been given I give all the glory to God. I could not have done any of these amazing things had it not been for Him. In fact, I could not have ever in my wildest dreams imagined most of these things!
Growing up I knew I wanted children, but I never could have imagined that I would have six amazing kids. It would have never crossed my mind that I would even be able to stay at home with them and homeschool them, but my awesome God made that possible. He allowed me to stay at home with them and raise them instead of sending them away to strangers. He let me serve in church and teach other kids all about His goodness. God let me marry an amazing man who would provide for us (which also comes from God) so that the kids and I could stay home together as they grew.
My God allowed me to go back to school after 20 years and helped me to do well. My dad and my brother were both writers, but who would have ever guessed that it would be me that would write and publish a book? Not me for sure! My God has done so many amazing things through me that sometimes it makes me dizzy thinking of how good He has been to me. I am not deserving of His goodness, yet He carries me through everything and keeps me provided for way beyond what I would be able to do. No, I am not bragging on myself at all, I am bragging on my amazing God. Words are not good enough to express how wonderful He is. I want to be sure that He gets all of the glory for everything that He has done in my life. Without Him I am nothing, but with Him, I can do all things. I am so in love with my awesome God!
Ephesians 3:20-21 Now to Him who is able to do above and beyond all that we ask or think according to the power that works in us— to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.
Today marks one year since I graduated college. Me! Steph Loughman. The girl who barely graduated high school. Not only did I graduate college, but I did so with a 4.0 grade point average and was on the Dean's List every quarter. So many amazing things have happened since then, including God giving me a message and allowing me to write a book which will hopefully lead to a ministry for my husband and I.
It may seem that I am bragging on myself. Anyone who knows me knows that while I brag on my family often, bragging on myself rarely happens. Don't get me wrong, I am bragging, but not on myself. For the things that I have accomplished or been given I give all the glory to God. I could not have done any of these amazing things had it not been for Him. In fact, I could not have ever in my wildest dreams imagined most of these things!
Growing up I knew I wanted children, but I never could have imagined that I would have six amazing kids. It would have never crossed my mind that I would even be able to stay at home with them and homeschool them, but my awesome God made that possible. He allowed me to stay at home with them and raise them instead of sending them away to strangers. He let me serve in church and teach other kids all about His goodness. God let me marry an amazing man who would provide for us (which also comes from God) so that the kids and I could stay home together as they grew.
My God allowed me to go back to school after 20 years and helped me to do well. My dad and my brother were both writers, but who would have ever guessed that it would be me that would write and publish a book? Not me for sure! My God has done so many amazing things through me that sometimes it makes me dizzy thinking of how good He has been to me. I am not deserving of His goodness, yet He carries me through everything and keeps me provided for way beyond what I would be able to do. No, I am not bragging on myself at all, I am bragging on my amazing God. Words are not good enough to express how wonderful He is. I want to be sure that He gets all of the glory for everything that He has done in my life. Without Him I am nothing, but with Him, I can do all things. I am so in love with my awesome God!
Ephesians 3:20-21 Now to Him who is able to do above and beyond all that we ask or think according to the power that works in us— to Him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen.
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